An Angel has Found His Home

 "When a starfish is broken, he will search for his way back home no matter what and heal himself there."

  Alex, I know it sounds gay that I am trying to compare you with a starfish but it is true. You are going home and for the second time I will have to let you go. How many times must I let go of a dead man, huh? :(

  In so many ways you were broken. In different turns you stood back up. But this last journey you are about to take would completely break me but it would complete your family. A family that has came to love me like I was a part of their own too.

  June 15, 2010. You were taken from me that day. June 15,2013. Another day that I felt you were taken again. The pain kept making its presence felt all over again. Every time I find myself thinking of that one unfaithful day, I draw strength from the memory of your hand giving me a pat on the back.

PS I Love You

".....Thank you for the honor of being my wife. I'm a man with no regrets. How lucky am I. You made my life, Holly. But I'm just one chapter in yours. There'll be more. I promise. So here it comes, the big one. Don't be afraid to fall in love again. Watch out for that signal, when life as you know it ends. P.S. I will always love you."

You know what's so stupid? It's watching this film (PS, I love you) and wishing you were the one telling me those exact same words (look up, there you go).

Too many times in my life that I tried re-living. Back to when I could hear you. Alex, I am too scared that a day would come and not remember how your voice sounded. Oh, Alex, I can't re-hush in my mind how you sounded. Help me remember, please. I long for another day with you. A day where I could just look into your eyes and get lost in them.

I am not ready to say good bye.But do I even have a choice? I don't think so. 5 more days and it's your 3rd year up there. 

I got really nothing say. I just wish I had you to talk to right now. 

I love you always,
A...